Somatic Healing For Divorce Trauma: Rebuilding Confidence with Loni Markman

Divorce is a life event that shakes us to our core, leaving us not only with emotional pain but with imprints that linger deep in our bodies. That’s exactly what this week’s episode of The Crazy Ex-Wives Club with host Erica Bennett and special guest Loni Markman, neurosomatic life coach, is all about: finding the power to heal by listening to our own bodies.

Understanding Trauma in the Body

Erica opens up about her own journey, sharing how talking through her problems helped, but only to a point. The real transformation began when she shifted her focus from verbal processing to healing in the body—through breathwork, movement, and learning to release the stuck “junk” from her cells.

Loni agrees, adding that “trauma in the body will keep us stuck,” whether it’s the “big T” trauma we typically associate with catastrophic events or the “little t” traumas—the tiny heartbreaks, dismissive comments, and moments of self-abandonment that accumulate over time.

Big T vs. Little t Trauma

What’s so powerful in this conversation is the normalization of trauma—even the small, quiet wounds. Loni explains that “little t’s” stack up: the times you’ve been ignored, made to feel too much, dismissed, or when you said yes when you meant no. Over time, these micro-injuries lead us to perform, bury our feelings, or numb out with “another trip to the fridge,” keeping us in survival mode and disconnected from our own needs.

Practical Tools for Everyday Healing

The path forward? Erica and Loni emphasize it’s about tiny, consistent acts of self-attunement. Healing is not about a single breakthrough moment. It’s about learning to pause, check in with yourself, ask, “What do I need to feel safe right now?” and allow whatever comes up—without judgment.

Real, practical tools are offered throughout the episode:

• Breathwork — Simply putting your hand on your heart or belly and focusing on your breath grounds you in the present and calms the nervous system.

• Tapping/EFT — This technique can be as discreet as tapping on your collarbone during a stressful moment. It helps release tension and reset your body’s response.

• Progressive Muscle Relaxation — Tensing and relaxing different muscle groups can quickly discharge stress and bring ease.

• The “Miracle Minute” — Taking just 30 seconds hourly to notice and name how you feel helps retrain your mind and body to find safety and neutrality, which is the first rung on the emotional ladder before you can climb toward happiness.

Grace, Compassion, and Tiny Shifts Forward

Most of all, both Erica and Loni remind us: grace is your companion on this journey. Healing after divorce is slow, layered, and absolutely possible. Give yourself permission to feel all your emotions—even the ones you were taught to silence. Over time, those 1% shifts add up, and with curiosity and compassion, you’ll find your way back to yourself.

Looking for Tools and Support?

You don’t have to do this alone. Take our healing quiz, join the free Facebook group, or explore The Club for women navigating divorce. Every small piece of self-tending matters—a message we all need, no matter where we are post-divorce.

Meet Loni Markman

Loni Markman is a neurosomatic life coach, Pilates energetics teacher, speaker, and creator of The Body’s Blueprint—a transformative somatic self-love program designed to help you feel at home, seen, sexy, and safe in your body.

With nearly two decades of experience in Pilates and movement modalities, Loni blends science, somatics, and soul into her work. She holds a master’s degree in nutrition, is a certified holistic health coach, and has advanced training as a psychology of eating coach and master TAC practitioner. As a sought-after facilitator and speaker, she guides women to connect with their core—emotionally, physically, spiritually, and energetically—helping them reclaim permission to live in alignment with their truest selves.

Over the years, she has helped hundreds of women break free from self-judgment, unlearn patterns that keep them stuck, and cultivate a loving, confident relationship with themselves. Through her programs, coaching, and speaking, Loni empowers women to tap into their inner compass, embody their power, and live boldly in bodies they adore.

Connect with Loni:
Website  | Instagram  | Facebook  | Join her Facebook Group 

Final Thought from Erica

Healing is never linear, but it is always possible. Give yourself permission to take it one breath, one choice, one day at a time. With love and grace,
Erica Bennett, Host of The Crazy Ex-Wives Club