Listening to the Whisper: Getting Through Divorce, One Brave Step at a Time

Real Stories, Real Healing, Real Hope – Lessons from My Conversation with Deb Drummond

Divorce can feel like your world is crumbling and you’re left standing in the dust, unsure which way is up. But you don’t have to go through it alone. If you tuned in to our latest episode of The Crazy Ex-Wives Club, you heard the powerful and deeply honest story from our guest, Deb Drummond. She opened up about the twists, betrayals, and hard-won triumphs after her marriage ended – and it was as inspiring as it was relatable.

In this post, I’m diving deeper into the insights we shared during the conversation and offering you actionable ways to support your healing journey after divorce. Grab a cup of coffee (or glass of wine!) and let’s explore how you can tune in, tap into your inner strength, and start over on your own terms.

The Power of "The Whisper" – Trusting Your Gut

One of the most goosebump-inducing moments Deb shared was what she calls the “whisper”—that intuitive nudge telling you something’s not right. She talked about waking up at 4 am, compelled to check her husband’s bank account, even though logically, she had no reason to suspect anything. Sure enough, that whisper led to discovering big truths that changed her life.

Here’s the deal: So many of us ignore those whispers. We don’t want to believe the worst. We brush off our intuition with stories like, “It’s just a phase,” “This is normal,” or “Things will get better.” But, as Deb and I discussed, our bodies and our intuition know more than we give them credit for.

If you’re feeling that small whisper inside, pay attention. Trust it. You are not crazy. You are not alone.

Shock, Betrayal, and Accepting Reality

When the truth hits? It’s a full-body blow. Deb described feeling utterly shocked—and so did I, years ago. One minute you’re living your life, and the next, the foundation is gone. It doesn’t matter if your marriage looked perfect from the outside; the pain of betrayal, especially infidelity, can leave you reeling.

What’s important to remember:

• Allow yourself to feel the shock. It won’t last forever.
• Cry it out. Scream if you need to. It’s normal and it’s healing.
• Find someone—anyone—who you trust to vent, without judgment. Sometimes you just need someone to say, “Yeah, that sucks.”

Healing the Body and the Mind

One thing both Deb and I noticed in our journeys: the stress of an unhappy or uncertain marriage shows up everywhere—your health, your weight, your sleep, your energy. Deb struggled with anxiety so severe she could barely leave the house. I battled digestive issues and inflammation for years, all linked to the emotional turmoil I was carrying.

But here’s some hope: When you start letting go, your body follows. Both of us lost weight—much of it just tension and excess inflammation—as the emotional load lifted.

Key tips to support your mind and body:

• Engage in daily self-care, even if it’s small (a walk, a shower, music, or breathwork)
• Ask for help from professionals—therapists, doctors, friends
• Listen to what your body is telling you. Sometimes rest is more productive than pushing forward.

Tools for Moving Forward – One Day at a Time

Moving on from divorce isn’t about “getting over it”—it’s about moving through it. As Deb put it, “Double down on what you love.” For her, work was a sanctuary. For you, it might be hobbies, time with kids, creative projects, or finding a supportive community.

What worked for us:

• Focus on what you love: Pour energy into your passions—you’ll get confidence (and distraction!) back.
• Set small goals: Even a simple to-do list can help you regain a sense of control.
• Community is everything: The Club exists for a reason, and it’s full of women who get you.
• Rituals and Holidays: Redefine these on your terms. Let go of guilt for not doing it the old way, and try something new.

Redefining Your Future – Write Your Next Chapter

There’s no “right” way to heal, and your timeline is yours alone. It might take years, or it might take months—but every step is progress. Take pride in reclaiming your independence and listen to the whisper of what YOU want from your new life.

A few final reminders:

• Give yourself endless grace—seriously, as much as you need.
• Allow the journey to be messy. There are no bonus points for getting it “right.”
• Find support where love already exists, and don’t be afraid to ask for help.
• Know that you WILL get to the other side, and it is beautiful.

If you’re ready for more support, stories, and practical healing, come join us inside The Club (the details are on our website). You’re not in this alone—promise. Your next chapter is waiting, and I’ll be here cheering you on the whole way.

With love and endless encouragement, Erica 💛

The Club: A Divorce Community to Help you Get Clear, Get Grounded and Move Forward. 

Psst… Have you heard? There is a new online space for you to get the support and guidance you need on your divorce journey. The Club is your space to heal, grow and get clear on what you want - whether you are unhappily married or taking those first steps through divorce. The Club offers on-demand programs, monthly live connection calls and a quarterly curated healing kit. Everything The Club offers helps you get clear and get confident on what you want in your next chapter. 

Grab your spot NOW: https://www.thecrazyexwivesclub.com/theclub

Learn More About This Week’s Guest: Deb Drummond

Deb is a trailblazing entrepreneur who has built seven international companies and inspired thousands worldwide. As the founder of the Show Up Stand Up Speak Up, Yes You! movement—broadcast to over 350 million viewers—she champions women's voices through her own televised women’s channel. With three decades in Top Performance, Deb is a renowned speaker, coach, and mastermind trainer who has worked with over 30,000 clients and moved audiences of 20,000 to their feet. She hosts the Mission Accepted podcast, interviewing entrepreneurs and creatives who share their paths to success, and leads Mission Accepted Media, producing anthologies and business books. Deb also created the Top Performance Day Planner and Tracker.

Connect with Deb

• Website: www.debdrummond.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/DebDrummond/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborahldrummond/
• Instagram: https://instagram.com/deborahldrummond
• Instagram: https://instagram.com/debdrummond_official
• Instagram: https://instagram.com/missionaccepted_media
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsnh0BsWjHS1aba4cItw4rw

Looking for More Support? Let’s Connect

• Instagram: https://instagram.com/crazyexwivesclub 
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thecrazyexwivesclub
• Website: https://crazyexwivesclub.com 
• Contact: [email protected]
• Free 15 Minute Consult: https://calendly.com/ericabennett/15min